Internal & External Support During Divorce

Divorce is 80% emotional, 10% legal, and 10% financial. 

Let that sink in for a second. The majority of this journey? It's about emotions.

We often think dividing assets or negotiating spousal support are strictly financial decisions, but they're deeply emotional. 

50/50, 70/30, $8,000…Numbers are neutral—until we give them meaning. They can feel like respect or rejection.

That's where emotional support comes in.

To navigate divorce as smoothly as possible, you need both INTERNAL and EXTERNAL emotional support.

INTERNAL begins with how you talk to and support yourself.

EXTERNAL can come from a coach, therapist, friends, and more–your ecosystem of support.

The folks I see who navigate divorce and co-parenting most smoothly are those who prioritize BOTH kinds of emotional support. 

Here's a Self-Kindness Tip for boosting your INTERNAL support:

I call myself “sweetie” (yep, seriously) and rest my hand on my heart.

When things feel unfair—hand on heart.  

When I feel disrespected or heartbroken—hand on heart.  

When I feel lost, scared, or overwhelmed—hand on heart.

Then I ask myself, “Sweetie, what do you most need or want today?”

It might sound a bit cheesy, but it's how I apply what's called the Reverse Golden Rule. We know the Golden Rule: treat others how you want to be treated. The Reverse Golden Rule? Treat yourself as kindly as you treat others.

So, are you as supportive and nurturing to yourself as you are to a friend? 

If being that kind to yourself feels like a challenge… I got you.

In coaching, we can work on building up your INTERNAL emotional support while also providing you with loads of EXTERNAL emotional support.